One thing is that we tend to find it difficult to forgive people who offended us. Have you learnt your lessons about forgiving people or not?
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Has life taught you any lesson on forgiveness?
- Thread starter Henrywrites
- Start date
I don't think everyone and everything should be forgiven. I don't ascribe to that. If a parent sexually abuses a child per se, nobody should be pushing that person to "forgive". That's an individual choice but not wrong not too. And I think that one can simply choose to move on beyond something and not let it dominate your life without having to "forgive".
I think it's an overused term. And real forgiveness should involve something from the offender such as regret, repentance, repair, repeat ( not doing it again) and then maybe there can be forgiveness. Yes, God can "forgive for they know not what they do". But, that is God. I am not God and would find it hard to forgive very egregious things.
However if we are talking about life in general, I think we need to forgive one another daily. None of us are on our best behavior all the time. I want the people I love to forgive me and I want to forgive them. I assume that things from most people come from a good place. And if not a good place, then maybe just a clueless or unthinking place. So no need to react as if someone is trying to inflict intentional hurt.
I think it's an overused term. And real forgiveness should involve something from the offender such as regret, repentance, repair, repeat ( not doing it again) and then maybe there can be forgiveness. Yes, God can "forgive for they know not what they do". But, that is God. I am not God and would find it hard to forgive very egregious things.
However if we are talking about life in general, I think we need to forgive one another daily. None of us are on our best behavior all the time. I want the people I love to forgive me and I want to forgive them. I assume that things from most people come from a good place. And if not a good place, then maybe just a clueless or unthinking place. So no need to react as if someone is trying to inflict intentional hurt.
Most, yes. There have been times where I couldn't forgive a person though.
Yep, exactly. I will never forgive people who bullied me or gave me a rough time at all. I don't care if we were just kids, teenagers, or whatever.
Yep, exactly. I will never forgive people who bullied me or gave me a rough time at all. I don't care if we were just kids, teenagers, or whatever.
I agree with that. I live with two other people and we all get into bad moods and annoy each other from time to time. If we didn't forgive each other daily then we'd be in a pretty miserable household.
I never forgive. Or forget.
I used to be bad about this. I would hold grudges for years, and eventually I learned that that was costing me far more than it was costing them. We all get the short end of the stick sometimes as a part of life, and this world is not exactly always the most fair or just place.
Nowadays I'm much more intentional about forgiveness. I just try to focus my efforts and energy towards my own life, my own goals, and on bettering myself in general. Holding onto the past doesn't really heal wounds, no matter how deep they run. I think that the bitterness is often just sadness that had nowhere to go, and we want desperately to reverse what happened and to change it. It comes knocking on the door when we feel the most helpless, claiming it's the cure, but in reality it just pours salt on an open wound.
I thought that justice was going to heal some of the deepest wounds in my life, but I never really found it. I did, however, find peace. And that was after fighting for years and realizing that letting go was the only way forward.
Nowadays I'm much more intentional about forgiveness. I just try to focus my efforts and energy towards my own life, my own goals, and on bettering myself in general. Holding onto the past doesn't really heal wounds, no matter how deep they run. I think that the bitterness is often just sadness that had nowhere to go, and we want desperately to reverse what happened and to change it. It comes knocking on the door when we feel the most helpless, claiming it's the cure, but in reality it just pours salt on an open wound.
I thought that justice was going to heal some of the deepest wounds in my life, but I never really found it. I did, however, find peace. And that was after fighting for years and realizing that letting go was the only way forward.
Very well put, Darth. I wish I could be like you.
How is that even possible? I don't have the bandwidth for that.
I'm not this way now. I learned my lesson.How is that even possible? I don't have the bandwidth for that.
Thats goodI'm not this way now. I learned my lesson.
I've learned to keep my expectations low. Humans are notoriously unreliable. Instead I just plan for them to mess up so there's nothing to forgive because failure was expected. To succed is a nice surprise. And just judge people on the merits of their abilities and how they handle things because nothing else actually matters.
