Fed up of being messed about!

[Raven]

So, I have been talking to this guy for about 5 months now. I've met him once. We started speaking occasionally when I was in Dog Days. Then about 5 months ago we started speaking every other day or so on Facebook and MSN. He lives about an hours drive from where I live.



Both of us have alot in common, He works as a mental health worker in the week and works in a forge every Saturday. I think the main attraction is that we are both Norse Pagans. And love being outdoors.



Also we'd make arrangements to see each other again and then he'd cancel (admittedly I have canceled once as the day before I got a really bad throat infection/cold and I didn't want him to get it.)



Now.. about a month ago - just before I went camping he starts acting weird and not really speaking anymore.

He is online every day but doesnt speak to me, And I had gotten abit fed up with having to keep starting a conversation only for him to not really continue it!





Anyway, heres the part which has really gotten on my wick the last few weeks. I stopped sending him messages as I thought I was annoying him, about 2 weeks passed and I get a message from him asking why I am annoyed with him, because ... get this.. I... I!! haven't arranged to meet with him again! So, I have to make all the arrangements now do I?!?!?! So I said to him, Look I arranged to meet you before I went camping but I was ill so couldn't make it. When I went camping I was literally down the road from where you live but you made no attempt to come and see me on my week off (he told me he was working, but he wasn't in the evening and he had some days of in the week where his clients had canceled.)



So, on Tuesday we arranged to meet up on Sunday (Today), Wednesday morning I get a message from him saying 'In my desires to see thor and loaf about with you i forgot I said to my mate Nebulous i would weld his bike frame on sunday' And guess what.... for the last 5 hours he has been on Facebook and he is still online now. Un-freakin'-belivable!!

 

[Evil Eye]

Well that sucks. What're you going to do?

 

[Cranos]

Yahh, if it's this hard to meet up with someone it's not worth pursuing imo.

 

[Raven]

Well I confronted him on Facebook about it. He's acting like a complete douche!



This was what he had to say.



Me: hey, whats up? your mate cancel on you?

Him: yes the c***, well not cancelled al together

Me: oh, thats a nice thing to say :/

Him: ive got to go in a min, about 15 to be precise. So ive had sod all to do now, hes a knob. problem is with him and his missus is they want everyone to fit around them.

Me: you should have said, we could have met up this morning/afternoon

Him: i didnt find out til a couple of hours ago. Apologies for my use of the word c*** but its the first thing that came to mind

Me: well if he couldn't make it he couldn't make it

Him: yeah but its mucked my day up

Me: ha, you've been on facebook all day lol

Him: yeah i know, i was meant to be going this afternoon, thats what im saying he cancelled on me just before i was due to go

Me: oh well its not the end of the world

Him: no but its bloody annoying

Me: tell me about it. thats people for you

Him: right i best be off, time to get angry

Me: dont be angry.

Him: well im going to say something, its not fair

Me: well, it cant be helped. cant be much of a friend if you going to give him a load of crap over a small issue

Him: im not going to give him crap im just going to say gimme a bit of warning cause i could have done something else

 

[Evil Eye]

Guess he really doesn't wanna see you...

 

[Raven]

Obviously not. But thats it now, I've had enough. Not arranging to see him anymore. No point if he just cancels on me all the time. He's had a massive moan about his mate kind of letting him down today, but doesn't seem to give a hoot about the countless times he has done it to me!

 

[Jazzy]

Self centered arse and his attitude sucks. You're better off without this freakin' idiot. He's making excuses for not seeing you that don't add up. He's obviously not interested in you and there's no reason for you to continue any conversation with him.

 

[Raven]

Exactly, Just pisses me off that I seem to attract these kinds of men!!

 

[Jazzy]

Exactly, Just pisses me off that I seem to attract these kinds of men!!

Same here with me!

 

[Raven]

I'm starting to think this guy has an anger problem. Oh well, I certainly shan't be on the receiving end of that!

 

[Nebulous's iconNebulous]

Wow sounds like a self centered jerk. Him living so far away would make a normal relationship impossible unless you or him were willing to travel a few times a week all the time. I don't think I could afford it if I was in that situation.

 

[Raven]

He's not that far really, I once dated a guy that lived 4 hours drive away.



I think if me and this guy would have got together we would have seen each other over the weekends.

 

[Jazzy]

Just curious how you felt it went the first time you met with him.

 

[Raven]

Everything was fine, we went for a work round the lake near him then had a drink in the pub, went out for another walk then went back to the pub to watch a band and chat. Was really nice, both of us wanted to meet again. But that was about 2 or 3 months ago now.



Now he is making excuses and I have no idea what I have done, if anything.

 

[Jazzy]

Everything was fine, we went for a work round the lake near him then had a drink in the pub, went out for another walk then went back to the pub to watch a band and chat. Was really nice, both of us wanted to meet again. But that was about 2 or 3 months ago now.



Now he is making excuses and I have no idea what I have done, if anything.

Could be that he's met someone else in that 2 to 3 month span. Might be the reason he's making excuses and he's not man enough to tell you.

 

[Raven]

Maybe, but I don't think so, He's being really nice and talkative again tonight, I'm just lost lol!



Now is asking if I'm mad and hopes I don't hate him. To be honest, I don't know him enough to hate him... Why would I hate him anyway?! Thats such a harsh word.





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Off Topix's Treasure Hunt

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[Jazzy]

Sounds like he's a moody person and I can't deal with people like that. One minute everything is fine and the next minute it isn't. They only want to do things when convenient for them and don't consider hurting other people while they're at it. That's probably why he's asking you if you hate him or not. He realizes he's moody and self centered and deep down I don't really think he cares about you. It's like he's just stringing you along when the mood hits him to do so. I would not want any type of relationship with a person like him. You'd just be setting yourself up for more excuses and more disappointment. Believe me, I'm not telling you what to do. I'm just stating what I would do if I were in your situation.

 

[Raven]

Yea I know, Mum says to give him another chance but sod that, I always do that with guys and look where it gets me! ... Nowhere!



I pretty much told him today i'm fed up with being excited that we will meet again only to be shot down in flames. I don't want that kind of crap in my life, I've been through it before and it's not nice.



Well he's not spoken to me for the last 2 hours so I think he got the message

 

[Jazzy]

Good for you! I don't blame you for not wanting this in your life. I've given people second chances and then was very sorry I did. It takes twice as long to get over the hurt when you let them do it to you a second time. Bet you'll hear from him again as he's probably just in shock now that you had the guts to tell him what you did.

 

[Raven]

So.... last night I sent him a message. This has really been bugging me and Friday I snapped. So I sent him a message on facebook.





Right im going to be blunt here. I said i wouldnt message you but fuck it.... I either get a response or I dont.... Yes I was/am mad.... I don't like the way you react to some situations. i didnt like the whole neighbour thing and i didnt like your attitude to the friends bike thing...



Considering I make ideas to go places and then at the last minute or the day after you cant go for whatever reason. i've pulled out i think twice because i was ill..... but youve done it way more . and to be honest, it feels to me as your not interested. Like its an excuse. I feel this because it has happened to me countless times before.. I dunno maybe it's just me but thats the way I feel. But I can't take it anymore, If you don't want to meet up please say so!



I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable. But I'd love to meet again.. I don't want to rush things but that doesn't mean I don't want anything.









And guess what.... Hes been online twice this morning and is on now... No reply. So looks like I have my answer, he just doesnt have the balls to tell me himself!