
A small boy was lost at a large shopping mall.
He approached a uniformed policeman and said, I've lost my grandpa!
The cop asked, What's he like?
The little boy replied, Crown Royal whiskey and women with big butts.
The Cop almost fell over, he was laughing so hard.
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Recently I was asked to play in a golf tournament.
At first I said, ââ¬ËNaaahhh!ââ¬â¢
Then they said to me ââ¬ËCome on, itââ¬â¢s for handicapped and blind Kids.ââ¬â¢
Then I thought..
ââ¬ÅDamn, - I could win this!ââ¬â¢
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My husband came home with a tube of K Y jelly and said, 'This will make you happy tonight.'
He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs.
He couldn't get back in.
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A lady is sitting at home when the phone rings. Hello, she says.
Hello, says the male voice at the other end. I bet you'd really like it if I came around, ripped off your blouse and bra and panties, then threw you to the floor and made hot, sweaty love to you
The lady replies, From one 'hello,' you can tell all this?