Nothing sadder than the look on my dogs face when I drop food from the table and they realize it`s lettuce.
Off Topix: Embrace the Unexpected in Every Discussion
Off Topix is a well established general discussion forum that originally opened to the public way back in 2009! We provide a laid back atmosphere and our members are down to earth. We have a ton of content and fresh stuff is constantly being added. We cover all sorts of topics, so there's bound to be something inside to pique your interest. We welcome anyone and everyone to register & become a member of our awesome community.
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Don`t forget to get offended today by some nonsense that has absolutely no bearing on your life whatsoever.
I`m 99.9% certain that every time a sock goes missing in the dryer, it comes back as an extra tupperware lid
Why do people say ”I saw it with my own eyes.” Do they sometimes use other peoples eyes?
The proper way to use a stress ball is to throw it at the last person who ticked you off.
Whenever it’s a long story, it means they don’t want to tell you.
A good lawyer knows the law. An excellent one knows the judge.
People often mistake me for being a good listener. The truth is, I really just don’t want to talk.
If your relationship status says, “It’s complicated,” then you should stop kidding yourself and change it to “Single.”
People who say “I hate to bother you” need to learn to hate it a little bit more.
Some people should consider having multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
Free will is good, but free pizza is better.
My brain is giving me the silent treatment today.
With the promise of Free Drinks or Food, I’m willing to go pretty much anywhere.
I’ve robbed banks before and they’re never getting their pens back.
Quite honestly, Officer, I wouldn`t have even pulled over had I known all you were going to do was criticize my driving.
Why does it have to be bacon OR sausage?
There`s something I need to get off my chest: Cheeto crumbs.
If Monday had a face... I`d punch it.
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