Hillarious Family Feud/Fortunes Answers

[MrMetroid]

Something you do in a Lift: Wee

A type of bean: Lesbian

Something you own that might turn out to be phony: A horse

Slang name for the police: Dick

Something you wouldn't try even once: Sex on a Train

Something that falls from trees: Bird Shit

Something you stroke: A match

Something that comes in a larger size for large families: Jeans

Name an animal with 3 letters in it's name: Alligator

Something you take with you to the beach: Turkey

First thing you buy in a supermarket: Turkey

A food often stuffed: Turkey



That's all I can think of for now

 

[Sam.]

I don't get it.

 

[Raven]

^ Basicly simple questions followed by stupid answers

 

[Sam.]

I didn't find it funny.

 

[The Dragon Master]

 

[Jazzy]

Arbitrator ar'-bi-tray-ter:

A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's.



Avoidable uh-voy'-duh-buhl:

What a bullfighter tries to do.



Baloney buh-lo'-nee:

Where some hemlines fall.



Bernadette burn'-a-det:

The act of torching a mortgage.



Burglarize bur'-gler-ize:

What a crook sees with.



Control kon-trol':

A short, ugly inmate.



Counterfeiters kown-ter-fit-ers :

Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.



Eclipse i-klips':

What an English barber does for a living.



Eyedropper i'-drop-ur:

A clumsy ophthalmologist.



>Heroes hee'-rhos:

What a guy in a boat does.



Left Bank left' bangk':

What the robber did when his bag was full of loot.



Misty mis'-tee:

How golfers create divots.



Paradox par'-u-doks:

Two physicians.



Parasites par'-uh-sites:

What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.



Pharmacist farm'-uh-sist:

A helper on the farm.



Polarize po'-lur-ize:

What penguins see with.



Primate pri'-mat:

Removing your spouse from in front of the TV.



Relief ree-leef':

What trees do in the spring.



Rubberneck rub'-er-nek:

What you do to relax your wife.



Seamstress seem'-stres:

Describes 250 pounds in a size six.



Selfish sel'-fish:

What the owner of a seafood store does.



Subdued sub-dood':

Like, a guy, like, works on one of those, like, submarines, man.

 

[Evil Eye]

 

[Jazzy]

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question in an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.