Long Distance Relationships (LDR's)

[Jazzy]

I know there is a thread about this somewhere but I don't feel like looking for it

So here goes....



Do you think LDR's are real relationships?



Have you ever been in one or are you in one now?



Share your thoughts or experiences with us.

 

[The Dragon Master]

I've never been in a long distance relationship.

 

[beowulf]

how far is 'long'?



long story but my partner and i met via a forum......we were 120 miles apart.......dated for a year (saw each other for long weekends twice a month) before she moved down to me.........been living together for over 2 years now

 

[Flurry]

I've been in a few LDR's in the past. I think they are just as real as a non LDR. It may be a little difficult at times cause you want to be with the person, but can't due to the distance. But you learn to deal as best you can. I think any LDR is worth it. And at the moment, I am in one. We've been together about 2 to 3 weeks. But it feels longer then that cause we talked for quite awhile as friends before getting together. I've come to care a great deal about her. And know that she feels the same. I'm hoping that unlike past LDR's, me and her will have the chance to see and be with one another in person.

 

[Jazzy]

I've been in a few LDR's in the past. I think they are just as real as a non LDR. It may be a little difficult at times cause you want to be with the person, but can't due to the distance. But you learn to deal as best you can. I think any LDR is worth it. And at the moment, I am in one. We've been together about 2 to 3 weeks. But it feels longer then that cause we talked for quite awhile as friends before getting together. I've come to care a great deal about her. And know that she feels the same. I'm hoping that unlike past LDR's, me and her will have the chance to see and be with one another in person.

How can a LDR be just as real as a non-LDR relationship? There is no physical contact. How can you be together if you've never met in person? How can you come to care a great deal about a person you have never met? Why didn't the other LDR's work out for you? Sorry, but I'm not following your logic here.

 

[Flurry]

[quote name='Sci']I've been in a few LDR's in the past. I think they are just as real as a non LDR. It may be a little difficult at times cause you want to be with the person, but can't due to the distance. But you learn to deal as best you can. I think any LDR is worth it. And at the moment, I am in one. We've been together about 2 to 3 weeks. But it feels longer then that cause we talked for quite awhile as friends before getting together. I've come to care a great deal about her. And know that she feels the same. I'm hoping that unlike past LDR's, me and her will have the chance to see and be with one another in person.

How can a LDR be just as real as a non-LDR relationship? There is no physical contact. How can you be together if you've never met in person? How can you come to care a great deal about a person you have never met? Why didn't the other LDR's work out for you? Sorry, but I'm not following your logic here.

[/quote]



There may not be any physical contact. But being able to talk to that person every day and getting to know them while doing so helps make it real and helps you come to care a great deal about them as well. Maybe I am a little weird in my thinking. But its how I tend to think. And even though we've yet to meet in person, and it may not be seen as us being 'together' cause we've yet to meet. But I think we are together despite that. Because we've grown to care about one another and feel deep feelings for the other. And as for your question of why they didn't work out. Well, we mostly wound up going our own seperate ways. I am still good friends with them though despite our separations.

 

[Temerit]

I'd rather not.

 

[Jazzy]

Most LDR's never work out, there's your answer...

Never is a strong word. I know some that have and the couples are very happy. May I ask why you think they never work out?

 

[Jonathan]

how far is 'long'?



long story but my partner and i met via a forum......we were 120 miles apart.......dated for a year (saw each other for long weekends twice a month) before she moved down to me.........been living together for over 2 years now

That's sweet

I think LDR is a REAL form of relationship. Some couples can do it, some can't.

 

[Jazzy]

There may not be any physical contact. But being able to talk to that person every day and getting to know them while doing so helps make it real and helps you come to care a great deal about them as well. Maybe I am a little weird in my thinking. But its how I tend to think. And even though we've yet to meet in person, and it may not be seen as us being 'together' cause we've yet to meet. But I think we are together despite that. Because we've grown to care about one another and feel deep feelings for the other. And as for your question of why they didn't work out. Well, we mostly wound up going our own seperate ways. I am still good friends with them though despite our separations.

You do realize that you are conversing with a person you have never met. How can deep feelings be made by typing each other or do you mean talking on the phone? Even then, do you think this is still a real relationship? Why do people do this? Is it because they cannot meet people who live close to them?

 

[identityissues8]

I was in one, once, with intentions of marriage. Nothing crazy like overseas, but let's just say it didn't work.

I no longer believe they can.

 

[Jazzy]

I was in one, once, with intentions of marriage. Nothing crazy like overseas, but let's just say it didn't work.

I no longer believe they can.

Intentions of marriage is very serious. How long were you in this LDR and how many times did you get to meet up?

 

[Jazzy]

I think a real relationship can work out if the two persons actually see each other everyday, or almost everyday, to hang out with each other, to talk to each other, to find out about each other, because at the end of the day, you can't really find out who someone is if you don't see and hang out with the person, and / or to live with the person...



Sooner or later their true colors come out, rather you like them or not is the key to staying with the person... Talking on the computer and / or phone as an relationship can be tricky and fabricated...

So, in your opinion, LDR's are not real realtionships....Correct?

 

[Cranos]

I consider them real relationships, because it's real for the people in it. I'm not entirely sure how you can have feelings for someone you haven't met, but apparently it's possible.

 

[Flurry]

There may not be any physical contact. But being able to talk to that person every day and getting to know them while doing so helps make it real and helps you come to care a great deal about them as well. Maybe I am a little weird in my thinking. But its how I tend to think. And even though we've yet to meet in person, and it may not be seen as us being 'together' cause we've yet to meet. But I think we are together despite that. Because we've grown to care about one another and feel deep feelings for the other. And as for your question of why they didn't work out. Well, we mostly wound up going our own seperate ways. I am still good friends with them though despite our separations.

You do realize that you are conversing with a person you have never met. How can deep feelings be made by typing each other or do you mean talking on the phone? Even then, do you think this is still a real relationship? Why do people do this? Is it because they cannot meet people who live close to them?

Either email or phone works. And its not like it just happens. It takes times for deep feelings to happen. But I do think it is a real relationship. As for why they do it or if they are unable to meet anyone. I'm not all that sure on it. It may not have anything to do with meeting anyone near by. But that a relationship winds up happening despite the distance.

 

[Saito]

Well, I'm defying what all of you say. Xarina and I are in one, and we're engaged now. I had to put her on a plane back to Sweden today, but in a year, she'll be back.



So, it can work if there's TRUST.

 

[identityissues8]

[quote name='Sayf Udeen']I was in one, once, with intentions of marriage. Nothing crazy like overseas, but let's just say it didn't work.

I no longer believe they can.

Intentions of marriage is very serious. How long were you in this LDR and how many times did you get to meet up?

[/quote]

We met up on numerous occasions.

She and I really knew each other. I don't do things like this online.

We wanted marriage for the sake of our preferences, ourselves and our religion.



Just didn't go that way.

 

[Flurry]

Marriage is supposed to be out of love, and nothing else... Right?

Supposed to be yes, but some use it as a way to gain their green cards and the like.

 

[Jazzy]

Marriage is supposed to be out of love, and nothing else... Right?

Disagree. The foundation of marriage is love. However, without trust, respect, compatibility and communication the marriage fails.

 

[Flurry]

[quote name='+abiel']Marriage is supposed to be out of love, and nothing else... Right?

Disagree. The foundation of marriage is love. However, without trust, respect, compatibility and communication the marriage fails.[/quote]



Very true.